Joined in 2023 
82 
63 About this deal
I have learned that if you live your life depending on other people’s approval, you will never feel free and truly happy. My workload soon started to get out of hand. I was making so many promises that I couldn’t remember who I was letting down from one day to the next. Every time the phone rang or my inbox pinged, it was another person asking for help or chasing up the help they had already solicited. My wonderful portfolio career, filled with interesting and engaging projects, had turned into a roll call of accusations. All the individual projects seemed to merge into a ball of pain. I realised I had developed a subconscious animosity towards the people for whom I was working. Instead of being clients or colleagues, they had become an annoyance.
The Joy of Saying No will help you identify your people-pleasing style and habits. A six-step framework then teaches you how to discover the healing and transformative power of no to If you said no to your mom, dad, teacher, uncle, grandparents, and so on, you were most certainly considered to be being rude, and you would have probably been told off for it.
35 Inspirational Saygin Yalcin Quotes On Success
If, like me, you’re having trouble saying no, this may help. Saying No Doesn’t Mean You’re a Bad Person And it turns out that being able to say ‘no’ is a vital skill for work success. In his new book Great at Work: How Top Performers Work Less and Achieve More, based on a survey of 5,000 employees and managers in which work practices were charted against results, author Morten T. Hansen has distilled the findings into ‘work-smart’ practices. The first step, he found, is to have the courage and discipline to focus on very few key tasks, and go all-in on those. Managers need to become ‘do-less bosses’ who listen to employees when they say that giving them more work is counterproductive. And employees need to get better at saying ‘no’. To make matters worse, much of the work I was struggling to do was unpaid. I was getting into debt because my to-do list was so full that I was turning down paid work.
My intention has and always will be to help people overcome the emotional baggage that creates these patterns so that we enjoy more love, care, trust and respect and break these generational patterns. I’ve recently discovered that it can be really empowering to reply in the negative. Ever tried it? I recommend it. The Joy of Saying No will help you identify your people-pleasing style and habits. A six-step framework then teaches you how to discover the healing and transformative power of no to: My boss called me one day and was asked if I could work the following Saturday. As usual, I blurted out a polite “Yes, of course, that’s no problem at all.” I actually had plans with my boyfriend, which I was really looking forward to.
35 Inspirational Pokemon Quotes On Success
I am also learning not to talk myself into more work. Just because I can do something doesn’t mean I should. It is great to be helpful, but there is a value in sitting on your hands and biting your lip. If you have also decided that it’s worth it to you, and want to learn to say no, try these simple yet effective tips for doing so with confidence. Helpful Tips for Saying No When patients struggle to say no to social arrangements, she says: “Sometimes that can come from a core belief of feeling, deep down, that they’re unlikable.” The roots of these beliefs are frequently buried in our past. “I often meet adults who had difficult experiences in childhood, where they felt on the outside of a social group or experienced a trauma, and they don’t want to say no due to a fear of being on the outside, that people will discover them as unlikable in some way. That can lead to this perpetual need to say yes or to keep others happy.” Her patients tell her, she says, that “they cannot continue living at the pace they’re living at”, but at the same time, they cannot stop – they cannot say no. When she hears these words, Andrew begins thinking about “the core beliefs underneath people’s inability to say no”. When patients describe struggling to refuse to take on extra responsibilities at work, she says there is often an underlying fear that others will think they are not trying hard enough, an underlying fear that they are not good enough. That compulsive “yes” also forms part of a precarious solution to their self-doubt, she says, as, unconsciously: “They use this constant striving to make themselves feel better, to get that buzz from achieving things.” Did you ever wonder why it was so easy to say no when you were a little kid and why it has become so difficult now? What happened?
I realized I was afraid of saying no because my biggest fear is rejection. I was afraid that every time I did this, I would disappoint someone, make them angry, hurt their feelings, or appear unkind or rude. Are you still playing a role you learned in childhood to please others, such as the Good Girl/Boy, the Overachiever, or the Helper? Though these kinds of roles may have gained us attention and affection, they prohibited us from becoming our true selves. For Chapman, life clutter builds up when we fill our lives with social events we do not really want to go to, work tasks we say yes to, when they are not our responsibility, toxic relationships and unhelpful thoughts and feelings. Just as Kondo promises to bring us joy by decluttering our homes, these books promote decluttering of a different kind – social, professional, psychological, existential – that, the authors tell us, will lead us to true fulfilment and freedom. Don’t lie. Lying will most likely lead to guilt—and remember, this is what you are trying to avoid feeling.If you provide a ‘because’, you have more chance of the person accepting. Even if it’s an utterly random reason, people are less likely to argue with it. But if you give a list of reasons, it undermines you. AND…REPEAT Saying no doesn’t mean that you are being rude, selfish, or unkind. These are all unhelpful beliefs that make it hard to say no. The second step to learning to say no is realizing that you are valuable and choosing your own opinion about yourself over others.
If you depend on other people’s approval, what you are basically saying is “Their opinion of me is more important than my opinion about myself.” The Joy Of Saying No" will be an excellent book for those people who tend to please others a lot, each with their different reasons. Although I'm not the target audience, I chose to read this book because I was curious about what people pleasers who have a hard time saying no think. So many of us struggle with feelings of abandonment, rejection, feeling not good enough, and people pleasing with emotionally unavailable and shady folks. We’ve been scared of boundaries, expressing our needs, being less than perfect, and becoming more of who we are, and so we settle for crumbs and abandon and hurt ourselves in the process. Practice saying no. Imagine a scenario and then practice saying no either by yourself or with a friend. This will get you feeling a lot more comfortable with saying no.Delivery with Standard Australia Post usually happens within 2-10 business days from time of dispatch. Please be aware that the delivery time frame may vary according to the area of delivery and due to various reasons, the delivery may take longer than the original estimated timeframe. Zeg jij vaak nee? Aan de hand van een simpel stappenplan legt Natalie Lue je uit hoe je kan stoppen met pleasen en zo dichterbij je authentieke zelf te komen. Hoe vaak zeg jij 'ja', terwijl je 'nee' wilt zeggen? Ga je hierbij aan jezelf voorbij? Doorbreek je patronen en stop met pleasen en andere boven jezelf te stellen. Kies voor een betere relatie met jezelf en je omgeving. Hierdoor ervaar je ongetwijfeld meer geluk in je leven. Think about the anguish, stress, and resentment that saying yes has caused you. Wouldn’t it be so much easier and straightforward to just say no in the first place?
Great Deal 
New Comment