The Best Ever Book of Dutch Jokes: Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who

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Birthdays in the Netherlands also have some unique customs and traditions. At birthday parties, it’s customary to wish “ gefeliciteerd” (congratulations) to everyone attending, not just to the person whose birthday it is. The Dutch are also notorious for hosting circle parties, where guests sit in a circle chatting while enjoying tea and cake. Gifts in the Netherlands

Waarom zijn Nederlanders zo goed in hinkelen? Ze zijn altijd op één been aan het staan voor de koning. (Why are Dutch people so good at hopping? They’re always standing on one leg for the king.) The Dutch are used to saying whatever they feel. If you are offended or you’re not comfortable, they might say: A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you.” The grasshopper says, “Really? In that case, give me a Kyle!” Hoe noem je een kameel met drie bulten? Henk Henk Henk (What do you call a camel with three humps? Henk Henk Henk) My son… Aldies is his first name – A-L-D-I-E-S, and his last name is – he has a double last name, of his mother and father – Ghoet – G-H-O-E-T, and a dash, Koper.At business meetings or formal occasions, it’s normal to shake hands with everyone present when you arrive, and again when leaving. In personal settings with friends or family, the Dutch commonly greet each other by kissing three times on alternating cheeks. If you’re meeting someone for the first time, it’s good etiquette to shake hands and introduce yourself to everyone attending. In reality, however, gender-based discrimination in the Netherlands still exists. Statistics from the European Commission on gender pay disparity reveal that women earn 14% less on average than their male counterparts. In an effort to confront gender inequality in the workplace, the Netherlands passed legislation in 2021 that requires large Dutch companies to appoint more women to leadership roles. According to the bill, all listed companies must meet a quota that ensures women make up at least one-third of their supervisory board. If this person is a man, you can also call him mafkees, after the Dutch first name Kees. The plural is mafkezen.

I’ve found countless examples of amusing expressions, insults and, vocabulary oftentimes with equally funny or interesting origins. I do love a bit of etymology so I’ve included some of them where known.

When I came across the Afrikaans expressions ‘ ń Klap van die windmeul weg hê‘, literally ‘to be hit by windmill’ meaning ‘to act crazy / unintelligent’I wanted to learn more! Despite there being no windmills in South Africa, this expression went unchanged from its original Dutch form ‘ Een slag van den molen weg hebbe’. Short netherlands puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The netherlands humour may include short dutch jokes also.